Sometimes, couples prefer to avoid attorneys when they seek an amicable divorce because they might think that attorneys are unnecessary. At other times, they fear that a lawyer will perceive their involvement in the divorce proceedings as adversarial. However, it is possible to achieve an amicable divorce with the assistance of divorce mediators. There are a number of benefits that can be experienced by either party during divorce mediation.
The first benefit is that the divorce mediator’s neutral position allows both parties to feel that they have been heard. Each person has heard what their attorney has said, and there is nothing that they would like to say to the other person that they would not have had the opportunity to say if they were in their attorney’s office. Having an amicable divorce mediation does not mean that one spouse is wrong, just that they are not trying to say that they are right. By having an amicable divorce mediation, both spouses are given the opportunity to communicate their views, and they can learn what the other feels might be helpful for them. It is also important to note that the divorce mediator is not trying to sway either party to one point or another. Each spouse has the right to speak freely, and the divorce mediator will ask pointed questions to ensure that each spouse is giving his or her thoughts clearly.
Another benefit is that a good divorce mediation generally tends to save a lot of time. This is because divorce mediators are trained to listen to both sides and to give their individual opinions. Because divorce mediation is individualized, the divorcing couple is able to concentrate on what matters to them. This means that one spouse is not spending time explaining why the other spouse should pay less alimony or receive twenty percent of the marital estate. When one party is willing to listen, the other spouse can more easily understand why his or her request should be granted.
While both spouses have the right to bring up issues that need to be resolved in court, it is usually wise to avoid an argument if at all possible. Even though a lawyer can offer good advice, there are many times where a lawyer’s professional knowledge will not be needed. If a couple is going through the courts together, then an amicable divorce can actually help them arrive at a more reasonable settlement. In some cases, this might mean that a lawyer might be better than an attorney. Many people do not feel comfortable having a judge to preside over their marriage, so the services of an attorney are often seen as the preferable route.
There is one disadvantage to an amicable divorce, however. The disadvantage is that it can take longer to reach a settlement when the parties are both working with a divorce lawyer. In addition, the process may be expensive, particularly if both parties need to hire a divorce lawyer. Also, amicable negotiations usually result in less money for each party. This can cause a couple struggling to pay off exorbitant divorce bills to reconsider the mediation process.
One of the most common reasons that divorce mediation is pursued by the parties is because one party feels as though the other party is trying to “force” the issue and manipulate the proceedings in some way. However, it should be noted that there is rarely any reason to think that a spouse would attempt to “manage” a contested divorce. Indeed, the vast majority of divorce mediation attempts to find a common ground between spouses so that they can reach an agreement regarding the divorce that both parties can agree on. A contested divorce is one where there is no hope of reaching a settlement, and the parties must choose one divorce method in order to move forward with it.
One thing to keep in mind is that in some instances, divorce mediation can actually achieve better results than a contested divorce. There are some couples who may feel that they cannot achieve an amicable divorce because of their personalities or their past relationships. In these cases, the divorce mediator can help the couples find a way to communicate effectively and arrive at an agreement. Therefore, it is not always necessary for a person to take the opposite extreme of an uncontested divorce if the relationship cannot break down.
If you are considering an amicable divorce, then it will benefit you to have a discussion with your spouse first. When you speak with your spouse, be prepared to share with them what caused your problems in the past, why you think those problems still exist today, and what you think can be done to fix them. If you and your spouse can agree on a solution without the use of mediation, then it will certainly be more beneficial for everyone to go through mediation instead. Once your communication has been opened, the next step is to hire a divorce mediator, preferably someone from a law firm that has experience working with divorcing couples. A good mediator will help you get through the process much faster and achieve an amicable outcome.